BONUS SONNET: A Day In The Life Of Oliveri

Triumphant from refinancing his home,
Mike Oliveri pauses now to gloat,
And suck on ice cream 'neath a plastic dome:
A Reese's Blizzard, or so he just wrote
On Twitter -- also how I know that he
Has found a use for Tower CPUs:
As fancy doorstops. And I read him see
A "douchebag's car" displaying drug abuse,
And call down hail upon his widdle head
Though his renaming of a doctor's role.
Yes, quite a day for Michael, as he's said:
But it's not done, for here my sonnet droll
Will surely touch off more witty remarks
For now I've fed him to the sonnet sharks.