In Which Nature's Charms Cannot Be Overstated

Comes now the news, via my Goodreads group
That sometimes, when some snails are on the move,
They travel by the means of some birds' poop.
This kind of science news recarves my groove!
Step One: Get eaten by a hungry bird
(Not angry: we all like some escargot);
Step Two: Let said bird fly somewhere. I've heard
It's nice in Tohoku, for instance, no?
Step Three: Just exit by the built-in chute.
Your shell should cushion gravity's effect.
While some might find this somewhat, well, uncute,
I find it charming, even nigh perfect.
O Tornadelides boengi, you
Know how to travel! Bon voyage! Adieu!

In Which I Ponder A Strange Metaphor

This morning, as I rose ere dawn, we had
A temperature of Zero Degrees "Eff"
(With emphasis on "Eff"; I won't be bad
And spell out what that stands for). Some foul theft
Of all our warmth had happened in the night,
And sunrise did not bring us more. It's cold -
More so than a well-digger's butt, all right,
As my friend Bonnie eloquently told
Her Facebook friends, which prompted a profound
Discussion, how the baseline readings came
To be established? Did one ask around
And quote well-diggers' feelings name by name?
Or was data - empirical and real
Recorded. Just how cold did each butt feel?

In Which A Vibrator Penetrates... A Yeast Cell

To introduce material into

Most things is just a simple matter of

A poke or tease to open them but who

Knew yeast cells were so hard to give some love?

But leave it to a Frenchman, visiting

To find a way to loosen up those cells!

A microfabricator's just the thing,

He found, for penetrating those tough shells.

Schizosaccharomyces pombe, how

Did you get so important that smart men

Worked so to build a toy that will allow

Them access to your secrets? Then again,

They just want you to take up what they shoot

Inside you, so the point is rather moot.