SONNET DARE: In Which I Try To Make Sentences Out Of Hashflags And Fail

The FIFA World Cup has come 'round again,
A season when e'en I do care somewhat
For sports. It's mostly just a nerd thing. When
The Twitter lords decided they would strut
Their geekery, creating #flashtags, who,
Then, was surprised? Just type a country's name
(Abbreviated, like on scoreboards): you
Then generate that country's flag. Each game
We tweet about will have some color. More:
An apopheniac and language dork
Like me will try to render semaphore
Of them, or to make sentences that work
With those abbreviations. Yet I fail.
Fine: shut me down. Put me in Twitter jail.

In Which We Wish @JorgeCandeias Parabens (Or Happy Birthday)

Comes now the time to bring to our Jorge
Candeias love and greetings. Parabéns.
I only follow half of what you say
But that's enough to know we're ever friends.
I can't wait till your novel's in my hands,
Admire what you do and how (this guy
Translates into the tongues of other lands
The better science fiction we let fly
In English). I know that I've faltered in
My effort to use "awesome" somewhat less;
As you have teased, it's so American
To make that word all-purpose. What a mess!
Mas O meu amigo, tratarei
To do a better job after today!

Sonnet Dare: In Which I Contemplate Pieces of Kate

I lost my temper at one point today.
Some news tore out my heart from in my chest.
My liver is on strike to make me pay
For the Greek beer I drank last night. It's best
That we don't even mention these, my knees
Rebelling, too, from biking on a flat
(My eyes refused, e'en though I did say "please"
To see in all that dark where we were at
Enough to pump it back to fullness) ache
Somewhat. I fear they might come off if I
Don't keep an eye on them. I'd hate to make
The error of misplacing them. I'm spry
But without them I'm hopelessly in place,
And someone's sure to ask "why the long face?"

BONUS BONUS SONNET: In Which I Drop A Subtle Hint

O Ian, dear, I wrote 'bout Sharks in Space
Just for your page; now for you I've a task:
What I want most in life's to see your face
Beneath a foil propeller beanie. Ask
Not why it's so; I no longer recall
Just how this project really got its start
(Though I know that it's my fault, after all).
My wish is true; it comes straight from my heart.
And such a little thing I do request:
Here even are instructions for just how
To build the hat. You can make up the rest!
As long as there's a spinner 'bove your brow
When it's all done. You think sonnets are free?
Now off to work. You've got 'til half-past three.

In Which I Break My Brain Trying To Bring Back Memories

This week in Saratoga, I got back
A pile of photographs I once had mailed
Home to my parents. From within this stack
Smiled all of my Brazilian friends I've failed
To keep in touch with. Once they taught me bits
Of Portuguese - that mostly over drinks
With the result that my command's the pits
When sober. Time passed faster than eyeblinks:
Years later I'm on Twitter and, for fun
I try to talk to guys from Portugal,
About books, stars and things in their own tongue.
They're kind, amused as I bust out my skull.
Fernando Fonseca and dear Jorge
Candeias, thanks seems not enough to say!